Andrew Yang Now Promises UBI Will be $2000 per Month If He Wins Primaries

New Hampshire — After an abysmal performance in the Iowa caucuses, Democratic candidate Andrew Yang has just announced that his Freedom Dividend will now go up to $2000 per month.

Andrew Yang is pulling out the big guns for this New Hampshire primary by upping the UBI (universal basic income) tax-free monthly stipends to $2000 per month. When asked about the increase, a rep from his campaign stated, “$1000 just wasn’t enough to convince Iowan voters. We don’t want to take another chance on a poor performance so we’re hoping $2000 will do the trick.”

When asked how the $2000 UBI stipend would be paid for, the rep stated “In addition to taxing technology companies with a VAT tax for the first $1000, we plan to sell a bunch of MATH hats , autographed Yang posters, & do paid Tweets on Twitter to fund the remaining $1000.”

Straight Facts B...sort of
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