CDC Warns of New Hennyvirus Outbreak

Atlanta, GA — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued a public health warning over concerns of a new virus called the hennyvirus.

The CDC states that there have been 35 confirmed cases of the hennyvirus just over the last 48 hours. The CDC believes this virus started spreading on about Feb 14.

The CDC believes the hennyvirus started spreading in cheap motels with low thread count sheets where guys took their woman to celebrate Valentine’s Day by drinking a fifth of Hennessy with no chaser prior to engaging in raunchy sex.

The CDC warns that if you come across anybody smelling Hennessy & Newports to immediately get away from them & to alert the authorities and medical professionals.

Straight Facts B...sort of
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